Graveyard Moments, Too

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"Graveyard Moments"

I have friends and relatives who no longer go to the cemetery on All Saints' Day. They have their reasons, and I respect their decision. But I think the tradition we follow on this feast -- visiting graves, offering flowers, lighting candles, saying prayers -- is both beautiful and meaningful.

It's true that the tombs only contain decaying or already decayed bodies -- sometimes not even that. It's true that the souls have long gone to heaven or purgatory -- hopefully, not elsewhere. And it's also true that the living can remember the dead even without going to the cemetery. Still, I find it meaningful to visit the burial grounds of our loved ones at least once a year -- to read and reread their names, to recall the dates of their birth and death, to remember how they lived and died.

It makes sense that we remember our loved ones who have died even without visiting their graves. But what about those family members whom we never got a chance to meet -- those whom we never knew in person but who are part of our personal history?

Bishop Luis Antonio Tagle (now the Archbishop of Manila) once narrated that most of his relatives are now abroad and how sad it was that, when the "young ones" in his family visit the cemetery, they no longer know or remember the dead they are visiting. 

I for one never got to know my paternal grandfather and maternal grandparents. On both sides I have relatives I never had the chance to meet. Visiting their tombs, offering them flowers, lighting candles for them, saying a prayer for their souls ... These are all I can do to thank them for helping to make me who I am today.

In a sense, All Saints' Day is like a big family reunion, a unique occasion for passing on family history. When we "tomb hop," we not only remember those who have died but also reach out to the living. We recall our common roots and reconnect with those like us who were left behind. We keep our shared memories alive. And right there, among the tombs of the dead, we celebrate life.